It’s been a while since I’ve written on here..it’s all wrong! I’ve finally figured out that instead of spending my lunchbreaks’ inhaling smoke in to my lungs for over an hour, I’m going to BLOG! This past week has been a real rollercoaster ride of emotions for me. My minds been all over the place. Family life, love life, college, work, Christmas..all over the place and I’ve never been the type of bloke to be depressed but, I was depressed. Right now, I don’t know how I’m feeling. Maybe I’ll wake up in the morning and have the world crumble on me again or maybe I’ll be back to myself. But I shan’t bore all with all these issues I have because I know that just like me, in some way, shape or form that YOU, yeah that’s right, you, I’m writing to you because you, he, she, they, them ALL, everybody has issues. Nobodies life is perfect. I know there’s a more than a million other people worse off than me. So I won’t ramble on. Although I will write about an issue I am having that’s fucking me up truly, tomorrow. Right now, I have to go to the most comfortable, happy place in my life at the moment which is sleep. Knowing my luck I’ll start having nightmares about all this s**!. Hasn’t happened yet, hopefully I haven’t jinxed myself. Goodnight all!!!
I’m one of those people who, no matter what time it is, how tired I am or how drunk! Like to just lay back and think about this journey. I’m not a praying person..don’t get me wrong, I will never judge another but I do have my opinions on religion. I’m more of a spiritual guy. In some cases, I believe that I am on a spiritual journey. Facing the good and bad. Positives and negatives. Taking them all in to account, learning and moving on. Anyway, I’m going slightly off topic. I guess I just want you all to know who I am. What I’m writing about is..I’ll lay back and give thanks for everything. Not to God. I make my own destiny. I thank my best friend, who may be deceased but his spirit guides me. His spirit is strength, loyalty and love and that was everything he was about and every single night since his passing, I’ve never failed to wish him sweet dreams. I’ve got a poem tattooed on my arm especially for him. I thank him for being in my life. I thank my girlfriend of nearly five anniversaries for being in my life and giving me so much and for pulling me through and not letting me go when I was ill. My girlfriend I’m so proud of. I thank my little brother for being the ray of hope and such a bright light in the family and I thank my family for everything they’ve done. People need to be grateful for what they have because without it..they would be lost. Just think – it’s not all that bad! As I sleep on my parents sofa..it’s not all bad! As a matter of fact, I’ll sleep well because in the morning, everything I’m grateful for, I’ll wake up to.